I Will Survive

Perhaps you thought I was crazy when I said it should be up to Miss Universe to greet the space aliens when they arrive, but recent research into ecology theorizes that Freaks Survive Because They Are Strange:

If a blue jay sees a normal-looking salamander, it will eat it. But if the same bird sees a freak, it may let it go.

University of Tennessee researcher Benjamin Fitzpatrick says this discovery, which his team reports in the open access journal BMC Ecology, suggests why rare traits persist in a population.

Predators detect common forms of prey more easily, the scientists figure. The majority that share a common look are always on the dinner menu, while oddballs are left to reproduce.

So let the aliens first identify the dim-witted, silicone-implanted bigot as this planet's prey, and maybe they'll leave the rest of us alone?

No, I haven't gone insane, but I thought this aspect of evolution was refreshing. Finally a theory that doesn't postulate that freaks die a sad and lonely death!