Seven Dirty Words You Won't Be Fined For

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Pray for Anything You Want

Pray4Trig, a site promoting a worldwide day of prayer to heal Trig Palin, can't be serious, right?

Also, it is known publicly that Trig Palin indeed has Down Syndrome. Science has no way to undo this condition, which is the result of an extra chromosome; but God can. When Trig Palin is found to be miraculously healed, everyone but the most hardened atheist will have to acknowledge God’s Majesty!

Poor Trig. He's always being used as a prop: first, by a narcissistic mother with political aspirations, and now by an idiot third party with a religious agenda or sick sense of humor depending how you look at it.

Of course, in reality land people would do better to pray for -- no, strive for -- respect and understanding for everybody like Trig.

But I guess that's not how a holy roller rolls, so I'll assume for a moment that the intentions of the site owner are completely sincere. Of course, both success and the inevitable failure of these prayers will be held up as "proof." When every cell in Trig's body is not "cured" of its extra chromosome, supporters will say that God is testing them or some such... or maybe Pat Robertson can drag out the pact with the devil thing or tell the baby that he lacks faith. A cool thing about science is that even if you don't believe in it, it still works.

But it's the glaring hypocrisy in these prayer vigils that pisses me off. A person who really believes in God won't doubt his perfect creation. Trig was created with that extra chromosome. It's the divine plan and all that. Oh, let me get George Carlin to explain it:


(YouTube video)

So even if that site ends up being a parody, at least we enjoyed a good Carlin video.

In The Beginning Was The Word

"You can safely assume you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do. " — Anne Lamott.

And you can safely assume conservative Christians don't even believe their own Bible when they endeavor to rewrite it. Apparently, the Bible, like reality, has a liberal bias. The dolts at Conservapedia aim to fix that with their "Conservative Bible Project." Yep. They're going to rewrite the holy book removing the liberal distortions that run amok.

One of the funniest project guidelines states "Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning." Personally, I can hardly wait to read the passages on Reagonomics. And the parts where Jesus defends the death penalty ought to be a hoot.

Despite all this so-called liberal bias, idiots have had no trouble quoting the bible to defend all kinds of atrocious things. And why not? The history of the bible is one of... forgive the pun... loose canons. Who's to say who wrote or translated what and why it was included or left out? Not to mention what it all means...

Oh hell. Why rewrite it when you can start from scratch? Remember kids, creating your own holy book can guarantee your entry ticket into heaven or whatever afterlife you create! Just ask Joseph Smith! Or this comedy duo:


(YouTube video)

Carlin, Gone But Not Forgotten

George Carlin made me laugh, but he is gone now. I found this video of Carlin giving his thoughts on the Persian Gulf War... you remember, it was that war we fought back in 1992? But everything he said then could have been said in 2008. And I'm afraid everything will need to be said again in 10 years, and again in 20 years, and again in 30...



Too bad he won't be around to say it.

I'd post a wreath of flowers and a flag at half-staff, but I too prefer to "leave symbols to the symbol-minded."