Thursday, May 27, 2010

Taking Their Government Back

America is speaking out on the House Republicans' new taxpayer-funded web site. And boy, we sure are funny, but I doubt that's what the Republicans were looking for.

"This site was developed as part of an official effort to increase the dialogue between Americans and their Congress. Here, Americans are provided a new platform to share their priorities and ideas for a national policy agenda."

I'm sure the GOP thought they were being cool and innovative, but somebody should have seriously Googled "flaming," "trolling" and "rick rolling" before jumping into this new-fangled Internet thing. If you think I'm making fun of Republicans for being out-of-touch, then you're absolutely right.

A forum? To express our ideas? On this computer thing? Well gollly!

And wouldn't you know it? Give them an open mic, and people start yapping. Here is what the true Americans are saying on their new so-ugly-it-must-be-hip-with-those-myspace-kids platform:
We should make English the official language of the US and stop spending tax dollars on translations for Mexicans! if English is good enough for baby Jesus, it's good enough for Americans.

The United States needs to quit beating around the bush and declare war on the Devil. He has clearly shown to be a great threat to our national security by creating brown people, gays, and Jews. I know he would be no match for our fine service men.

ONLY gays in the military. Think about it.

We should invade China and take our money back.

The USA don't need socialist measures such as 8-hour work days, weekends off, paid vacations, banning child labor, or the minimum wage if we want to stay competitive against giants like India and China.

Look for more of the un-American places to spread our freedom.

No one should be allowed to criticize corporations, period. It's disrespectful and unAmerican.

Over time I have found that American sour cream just isn't sour enough. This is a national disgrace and is holding us back as a country. Soon we'll be nothing but whipped cream liberal candyasses.

We need to eliminate 62 days out of the US Calendar every year. That way we will move through time faster than other countries and we will be able to find out about new technologies first. Plus we can see the future. Don't tell the French.

Why hasn't anyone followed up on Sarah Palin's idea that we should have Death Panels to decide who gets medical care? I read about her Death Panels suggestion and thought it was very constructive and would make most of the recent very expensive health care plan unnecessary. The congress ignoring Sarah Palin's Death Panel idea shows that they were not serious about listening to the American People and their Constructive Ideas.

The government should never give you up, Never let you down, Never run around and desert you. Never make you cry, Never say goodbye, Never tell a lie and hurt you.
Mother Jones has collected a few more stunning examples of this crowd-sourced policy making.

Now, who wants to bet some Republican candidates will actually campaign on a few of the "constructive" ideas listed above? Who wants to bet that the GOP will completely ignore any good suggestions that don't already fit their established agenda?

And who wants to bet that if the Founding Fathers could see us now, they'd pat themselves on the back for shunning direct democracy?

No comments: