Viva Steele!

No way could I let this story slip past the Dorkmonger. The "family values" Republican National Committee, headed by Chairman Michael Steele, spent nearly $2000 of donor money at a lesbian bondage-themed strip club in West Hollywood. Apparently, conservative Christians like to conduct business while naked women simulate sex in nets hung from above.

Hmm... but what do I title my blog post? Risque Business? Republinatrix? Balls of Steele? Beating the Party Whip? Oh hell, I can't compete with the Daily Show. Presenting 2 Girls 1 GOP:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
2 Girls 1 GOP
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Although it's easy for Democrats to speculate whether Steele will be fired, we all know he's not the true RNC leader. He might make decisions about how to spend their donor money. He might push the party deeper into deficit spending with his lavish ways. But we have seen time and time again that the real leaders of the Republican party are Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck and Fox News. They decide the agenda and ignite their reactionary base.

The RNC won't fire Steele. They can't. Because in their minds, keeping him around proves that they aren't racists! Besides, to bloggers everywhere, Michael Steele is the gift that keeps on giving. So I say, "Viva Steele!"

RNC Playbook

Remember that Brady Bunch episode where Marcia's boyfriend from a rival school steals Greg's football playbook? Yeah, well, these things happen.

But this time it's the RNC's strategy guide uncovered by Politico, and the plays are cynical and offensive even by Republican standards:

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So the Republican party officially uses the idiotic extremist posters and slogans of the teabaggers while labeling that part of their base as "reactionary." And they call this "strategy"?

Change in a Teabag

I cringe every time I hear the word "teabag" now. I thought that, in time, I would recover, but apparently the Republicans want to tea party like it's 1999 or something. Even Republican National Committee chairman Michael Steele, one of the few Republicans not invited to any tea parties at all, says a Republican renaissance is "being delivered in a tea bag, and that's a wonderful thing." It is? The imagery doesn't really work for me. I'm picturing the soggy teabags my parents leave laying all over the house. Not a wonderful thing. Stephen Colbert mocks, and the word tonight is "I Know You Are But What Am I?":

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
The Word - I Know You Are But What Am I?
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Also, I'm trying to figure out the part of Steele's speech where he declares an end to the "era of apologizing for Republican mistakes of the past." Did I miss that era? Or was Steele talking about all his groveling to Rush Limbaugh?